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Patron Word Jumble: Vibrator Edition

posted by Elana McKernan on Thu, Mar 12, 2009
in At the theatre

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One would think that a title as distinctive as "The Vibrator Play" would stick in people's minds. Even if you forget that, Sarah Ruhl's new show has ANOTHER title for you to fall back on: "In the Next Room."

Apparently, though, double titles lead to double confusion for patrons. While "In the Next Room" may not be the most jumbled title in the history of the Berkeley Rep, it is certainly one of the most amusing. I have compiled a list of the top ten alternate titles for "In the Next Room," brought to you by your confused neighbors in Berkeley!

Want to join in the action? Call in for tickets! You only have until Sunday to share a deliciously awkward interaction with the Box Office employee of your choice. Don't miss out! Because, really, how many ways can you mangle "Crime and Punishment?" "Punishment and Crime?" "That Murder Show?"

Without further ado, read on for butchered vibrator goodness (one can only hope that Sarah Ruhl takes notes so as to better title her plays in the future):

10. The Room Next Door (A fairly accurate description of the location of the Roda Theatre in relation to the Box Office)

9. The Door Down the Street (Ditto)

8. Down the Hall (A bit less accurate, but I admire the creativity)

7. That Sarah Ruhl Play (Can't fault the logic here)

6. The New Play by that Eurydice Author (True, true)

5. The Vibrator Room (Sure, why not?)

4. In the Next Vibrator Room (One wonders where the "first" Vibrator Room is?)

3. That Play About Sex (Ok, now this is getting a little ridiculous)

2. That Vagina Show (I'm doing my best not to develop too many mental images of this one)

...and finally, winning the prize for the most amusing and uncomfortable interpretation of Sarah Ruhl's new masterpiece:

1. I WANT VIBRATORS (Emphasis was the patron's, not mine. At the time, I wasn't sure if she had mistaken us for a sex shop. In retrospect, I'm fairly certain she was just a little overzealous in inquiring about tickets)

I must give an honorable mention to the most awkward conversation of the year, though it illustrates a metaphorical, rather than literal, mangling of the Vibrator Play. The conversation went as follows:

Patron: What do you have playing this evening?

Leah: In the Next Room, or the Vibrator Play.

Pause.

Patron: What's a vibrator?

Leah: ...excuse me?

Patron: A vibrator. What's that?

Pause.

Leah: It's...something...people use on their bodies...to massage themselves.

Pause.

Patron: Why is there a play about that?

Leah: Well, it's not just for massages. It's--um--women use it, mostly...it vibrates, you know?

Pause.

Leah: (continuing) ...um, women, they sometimes use it on other parts of their body...

Patron: What?

Leah: Down, you know...they, um, use it sometimes for...sexual pleasure.

Long pause.

Patron: (Smaller voice) I think I'll check online for information on your next show.

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